Faith and Mental Health, in My Own Voice, Journey to Healing, Recovering Humanity

Mommy, Are You Ok?!

Mommy, are you Ok?!” was the question she asked, as I laid in the bed while everyone else ate.

“Yes Munchkin. I’m fine.” is how I responded.

“Are you sure?!

“I can tell you’re not fine by the bags under your eyes.”

“Yes. Munchkin. I’m fine.” I responded again.

Knowing what I was saying wasn’t true at all.

But, how do you tell your child you’re sad?

Not just frown face sad but depression sad?

How do you explain what depression is?

How do you tell her “It’s not your fault” every time you yell?

How do you get her to see she did nothing wrong?

How do you get her not to worry and not to be sad herself?

To know this is a part of who I am and not who she is?

Maybe instead of saying “I’m fine” the conversation should go more like this…

“Mommy, are you Ok?”

“No Munchkin. I’m not Ok.

“Mommy is sad, really really sad.

“She struggles with something called depression.

“Depression is a dark shadow that takes away Mommy’s happiness.

“Depression makes it hard for Mommy to see the good in situations and sometimes people.

“Depression makes Mommy want to lay in bed all day.

“And sometimes not eat.

“Depression makes Mommy cry, sometimes for no reason at all.

“Depression causes Mommy to be mean and sometimes says things she doesn’t mean.

“But, one thing depression cannot and will not do,

“Is stop me from loving you!

“So, no. Mommy is not Ok.

“At least not right now.

But, I’m doing the best I can

To make sure that you are.”

4 thoughts on “Mommy, Are You Ok?!”

  1. Honesty and real conversation about Mommy not being ok – that is the answer. Talk through it together or with someone, pray together and continue loving each other. It’s ok to not be ok. Your daughter is smart and a wise “old soul” – she will be alright, as you will be as well.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. First and foremost, my heart, thoughts and prayers go out to you. I fully understand the battle of depression. Those conversations are difficult to have whether it is with your children, your friends, significant other or other family members. Earlier this year, I was inspired from one of your sessions, about clergy reaching out for the mental health, to seek help for my own battles. It has been such a blessing for me to have found amazing counsel. I still struggle, but do believe that I am building a strong support system, and it is helping in my journey tremendously. As your friend, I want you to know that I love you, you are on my mind and I am here for you. I am not a professional by any means but you can have my listening ear. I would love to be a part of your support system however you want me.

    Liked by 1 person

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